Termites

I have a termite problem.  Let me also say that I'm speaking metaphorically.  You see, with termites the problem is usually unseen until it's a serious problem.  A termite is a tiny little thing that can cause major damage to a home.  For me (and I'm hoping I'm not the only one) my termites are also tiny little things that have and will cause major damage.  Here's a list of some my termites:

lack of self discipline

low self esteem

anger

selfishness

But possibly the one that has caused the most damage is insecurity.  You may be thinking that insecurity goes with low self esteem.  I see them as two different issues.  

*** Let me take this opportunity to say this is not a post in hope for encouragement.  I'm sharing somethings God is showing me. *****

Self esteem for me is how I view myself.  My self worth in other words.  Insecurity is the feeling of inadequacy.  I'm not sure why I feel so insecure.  My parents were very encouraging.  I've been pretty successful in most everything I've pursued.  Still, when I'm sitting by myself I don't feel like I measure up to the world around me.  Those who are closest to me find this as no surprise.  But for anyone else this may sound odd.  

I think there are more people struggling with this issue than aren't.  Even the people who seem to have it all together have moments of insecurity.  What insecurity says is that God has made a mistake.  I don't like to think of it like that but it's the truth. 

So just like termites, when we don't take care of the insecurities quickly, they reek havoc in our lives the older we get.  I assumed that I would grow up and grow out of some of the things I struggle with.  Age has only seemed to amplify these areas in my life.  An insecure teenager creates a desperate adult.  And like a home with termites, everything may seem fine on from the outside for a while.  But given time the weak areas will fail.  

My plan is to stop believing the lies the enemy is telling me.  To trust in those who do encourage me.  But most of all, I'm going to lean on the fact that God has never made a mistake.  He has called me to this life.  He has placed me in this body.  He has created my abilities.  He created my soft heart for a purpose.  

Do you struggle with insecurity? How are you facing this challenge?